Category Archives: Booze

Dear Jono #poetry #poem

You brought me nothing but sorrow

The day the police arrested you

Was the day I thought I was finally free!

But I did not foresee the nightmares and flashbacks that you left with me

Eight years later and I’m still not free

Even though you may have gone

You are an unwanted quest

In my mind that still can’t rest

I don’t feel anger or shame

But I must admit you are to blame

Actually NO

That’s lame

It’s just that life will never be the same

Nightmare! #poetry #poem

My life was once a mess

I realised this was a test

One day I awoke

This is a serious joke!

Something must be done

I was done with this one

At last I knew I deserved better

This wasn’t how it’s meant to be!

I was treated like shite

Why would this be right?

I was low in confidence

My head is going to blow

I craved alcohol and coke

This was my way

It wasn’t the way

but it did help me on my way

The nightmares of abuse are so intrusive

The day after makes me feel illusive

Years on I found and loved myself

This was when of course I found this man

Who took me as I am

No pretend

I am most definitely on the mend

I’m not quite there

But in time

With this man of mine

Sometimes I am sad

But bear in mind

The life I once had

This man is so kind

It’s hard when I see my life in rewind

It’s hard to see his faith in me

but we both agree it’s meant to be

Time and therapy are a great healer

Another Full Moon #poetry #poem

Another full moon
Is it me being a loon?
This time I’m not drinking
Nothing to help drown out this over thinking
My head and heart are pounding
Only feeling safe in the familiar surroundings
I want to be able to go out without the panic
The thought of the cinema or meeting a friend
Makes me feel manic
I know the cycle will repeat
Unless
I can keeping stepping out on the street
One step at a time
I don’t want to be left behind

Battle of the Booze #poetry #poem

10 days since my last drink
9 days since I thought I was dying

I went to the pub and ordered a wine
My body did not feel fine
Meduim white, with a splash

Usually its a large red
The wine on the table made me feel sick

Heart racing, thinking why am I drinking?
I read my book
Prescription for the heart, body and soul

Another sip I take, another poem I read
There’s no reason to panic, there’s no need
I continue to drink and read

I feel more relaxed
I don’t feel like I’m going to collapse

Then comes the next day
And repeat of
I think I’m going to die

The Come Down Is… #poetry #poem

Sitting in Stratford
Thinking what is happening
My body aches
With the come down from the alcohol

The come down is … I’m never drinking again
The nightmares are … frightening, from the past, I’m to scared to sleep
The hatred of oneself is … I’m not good enough
The palpitations are … constant and corrosive
The paranoia is … I cant see anyone, nor do I want too.
The panic attacks are … an intense tingling from my toes to my vagina, then to my chest, with feelings of regret
The fear is … the worst thing possible is going to happen
The insecurities are … he deserves better
The emotion is … Misery, I don’t want to die, it makes me want to cry, the alcohol is not a high

My mind is over thinking, all because of drinking.
Dark with despair
Self pity , self worth